Loved ones make annual trip to Arlington Cemetery grave of FDNY firefighter killed in Iraq

For retired FDNY Lt. Mark Klingner, the season of giving doesn’t begin until the third weekend in November, when he travels 247 miles to Arlington National Cemetery to honor the memory of fallen city firefighter Christian Engeldrum, who died serving in Iraq.

It’s a journey Klingner has happily made for the past two decades to ensure the memory of the beloved firefighter, soldier, and dear friend won’t be forgotten. It also reminds him why the holidays exist in the first place: to gather with family and close friends and be there for others in need.

“It’s amazing it’s been 20 years. It feels like yesterday,” Klingner, 52, told the Daily News. “We’re more comfortable with the feelings over what happened but it will never stop hurting.”

Engeldrum, a Bronx resident, former cop, and five-year FDNY veteran, was killed on Nov. 29, 2004, when a roadside bomb exploded near his Army National Guard convoy outside Baghdad, where he was deployed during Operation Iraqi Freedom. He was the first New York City employee to die in Iraq.

Before going overseas, Engeldrum, a sergeant with the National Guard, served in Ladder 61 in the Bronx, where he worked with Klingner.

Each November, Engeldrum’s family, his FDNY brothers and sisters, and members of Veterans of Foreign War Post 12033, which was named after the fallen firefighter, meet at Ladder 61 in Co-op City and take a charter bus to Arlington Cemetery to visit Christian’s grave.

This year Klingner brought his 16-year-old son Christian — Engeldrum’s namesake.

While traditions like this wax and wane with each passing year, more than 60 people made the trip this year to mark the 20th anniversary of Engeldrum’s passing. So many planned to come that they had to get a van to follow the bus.

“(The trip) helps us all go through the day together and absorb the stresses that come with it,” he said.

The only time Engeldrum’s loved ones missed the special trip was during the height of the COVID pandemic.

This year’s remembrance was especially moving with a visit from Mike Brown, who served with Engeldrum in Iraq and was with him on the day he died.

“I was about 75 feet behind him when we heard the explosion,” Brown, 55, remembered, choking up at points as the memories of that terrible day flooded back. “It was loud. I was calling out to him and he didn’t respond. I asked my gunner, ‘What do you see?’ But all he could see was a lot of dust.”

Brown and his team got out to investigate and found Engeldrum’s Humvee destroyed. Brown immediately feared the worst.

“If he was still up he would be doing something. I had a feeling…” Brown trailed off as he thought about his longtime friend, who he nicknamed “Drum.”

“Chris was a doer,” Brown recalled. “There was never any complaining. His nose was always to the grindstone. If you needed something done, he’d be, ‘Let’s get it done.’ He would do anything for you. In that big chaotic scene he was a bright spot.”

After traveling down to Arlington, the group gathers at Engeldrum’s grave to pray and share a few memories before having dinner in Alexandria and returning to New York.

“It’s a long day but it’s one day out of my life and an honorable day for us,” said Klingner, who takes cues from Engeldrum’s widow Sharon as to how long they will keep this special tradition alive.

“I told Sharon from day one, ‘When you’re done, we’re done,'” He remembered. “We’ve kept it going all this time. It’s a lot of fun to be with the family.”

The pilgrimage is never made on the exact anniversary of Engeldrum’s death because it lands too close to Thanksgiving. The firefighter also died on his son Royce’s 16th birthday so the family tries to separate the two occasions as best they can.

Royce, now an FDNY firefighter, took the trip this year with members of Engine 88, his firehouse in the Bronx. His co-workers never met the fallen soldier but realized how important it was to keep Engeldrum’s memory alive.

“My dad was the type of guy that a lot of people modeled their lives after,” Royce said. “He had a magnetism to him. He was always a leader and had tons of respect from his peers. Not a day goes by at the firehouse that I don’t think about him.”

Noting the 20th anniversary of his father’s death, Royce said this year’s trip to Arlington weighed heavy on his heart. But everyone on the bus turned the sad occasion into a “joyful event” — a testament to Engeldrum’s enduring legacy.

“Everyone is sharing stories about him and everyone is happy,” his son said. “I’m happy he’s able to inspire people like that to this day.”